MANAGING THE BLESSINGS AND CHALLENGES OF LIFE
Janet Voss, MA, LCPC
Many people naturally approach life seeking pleasurable and rewarding experiences and seek to avoid painful ones. However, we commonly end up facing a mixture of both through life. Major changes in life are sometimes expected and planned, at other times they come with little preparation or anticipation, and both create a mixed crisis.
Blessings and challenges create a mixed crisis of change and loss, and one of opportunity. Both blessings and challenging circumstances create stress reactions in us. However, research indicates that even positive and rewarding experiences; a much welcomed move, a marriage, a new job, a new child in the family, are also experiences which create a stress reaction in us. At a recent workshop one participant mused, “I never understood how moving can be as stressful as other life events and create such a sense of loss.”
We are impacted physically, mentally, emotionally, and spiritually by both positive and hoped for changes as well as in difficult circumstances. Since stress can hit us at many levels, it is helpful to counter stress in a multifaceted approach. A good plan for managing and minimizing the impact of change and stress is one that will incorporate easily into your lifestyle, your responsibilities, your values and most importantly a good plan is one that will work for you. It is helpful to consider a nutritional component, exercise, relaxation, your support network and a plan to manage and minimize feelings of anxiety or depression; two very common emotional reactions to stress.
Research indicates some people are naturally better equipped or predisposed to handling stress through genetics. However, most everyone can learn to handle and manage stress with tools and support. Managing stress involves practicing new skills and trying new behaviors. The good news is that we get better at dealing with stress over time, when we make a conscious effort in key areas.
Sometimes we manage stress well naturally or without much conscious effort, or we make a few changes and we return to a state of equilibrium in time. At other times we get stuck and we are “stressed” for long periods of time with no end in sight. It’s when stressful situations go on unresolved for long periods of time, or when coping becomes too difficult or exhausting, that a professional consultation can provide more immediate and thorough resolution. Facing the effects stress is taking on our bodies and minds and emotions and spirit is sometimes the hardest and most difficult step in the process. After that, we can begin to find solutions and move towards the answer.